You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize