Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize