You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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