So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
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