i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
