Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
