sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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