I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
My dick has a subreddit
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
