party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
just found out that she named her cat after me.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
