try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
