it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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