She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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