Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize
