He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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