i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
