i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
It was confusing and full of hummus
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize