There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
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