Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
the liver wants what the liver wants
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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