Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
grandma shit on top of the toilet
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
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