Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
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