elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
My butt remains clenched, sir.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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