Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Randomize
