help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Randomize