We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
