You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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