i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
