5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
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