He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Randomize
