You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
