Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Randomize
