it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
