Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
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