when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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