Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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