my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
