i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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