Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
