She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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