Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
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