they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
Randomize
