Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Randomize