i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
