She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Naked Twister starts at high noon
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize