Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
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