dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
