Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
