Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
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