i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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