Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
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