I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Randomize
